Everyone Says "Hi" Leigh-Ann
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Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
22) Good News - 5th November
Leigh-Ann and I are getting married.
I proposed to Leigh-Ann in October last year. We were on holiday in Bali with my son, Oliver and his girlfriend, Emily. We had been dating and then living together in Nerja, Spain for one year.
We never set a date. We were just happy living together and enjoying our lives.
Now, things are different and it is the right time to announce to everyone that we love each other and want to be together for as long as that may be.
We are waiting for an appointment with the Oncologist in Abbotsford which should be within 5 - 10 days!
I proposed to Leigh-Ann in October last year. We were on holiday in Bali with my son, Oliver and his girlfriend, Emily. We had been dating and then living together in Nerja, Spain for one year.
We never set a date. We were just happy living together and enjoying our lives.
Now, things are different and it is the right time to announce to everyone that we love each other and want to be together for as long as that may be.
We are waiting for an appointment with the Oncologist in Abbotsford which should be within 5 - 10 days!
Monday, November 4, 2013
21) Results - Monday 4th November
As I wirte I do not know quite how I feel. Angry, tired, emotional, pissed off?... The list goes on.
This is the hardest thing I have ever had to write. What do I say and how do I say it?
Leigh-Ann's results are bad.
Everything that we did not want to hear we heard today and more.
Her cancer has spread and it is not operable.
I was sitting next to Leigh-Ann when she was told the news. She cried but she was strong and brave as she has been throughout. I have nothing but admiration and respect for the dignified way she has dealt with everything. All the tests and all the injections, the appointments at the doctor and the hospital visits, the pain and the discomfort.
As I write she is sleeping.
Bad as it is we do not know the prognosis. There is treatment available and we are in the best place to get it. When we meet the oncologist we will find out what we do next...
Just one month ago we were playing padel in Spain. "Go figure".
Please continue to support her with good, happy news, thoughts and pictures.
This is the hardest thing I have ever had to write. What do I say and how do I say it?
Leigh-Ann's results are bad.
Everything that we did not want to hear we heard today and more.
Her cancer has spread and it is not operable.
I was sitting next to Leigh-Ann when she was told the news. She cried but she was strong and brave as she has been throughout. I have nothing but admiration and respect for the dignified way she has dealt with everything. All the tests and all the injections, the appointments at the doctor and the hospital visits, the pain and the discomfort.
As I write she is sleeping.
Bad as it is we do not know the prognosis. There is treatment available and we are in the best place to get it. When we meet the oncologist we will find out what we do next...
Just one month ago we were playing padel in Spain. "Go figure".
Please continue to support her with good, happy news, thoughts and pictures.
20) The Big Cry - Sarah's Guest Blog 2 - 4th November
The big cry
I asked mom the other day "do you think you have cancer? Is that what you believe is inside of your body?" Such a hard question to ask anyone, especially your mom. In the spirit of being blunt, like her and I have always appreciated, I faced the fire and asked anyways.
Mom said yes, without any hesitation. Despite still not having the pathology reports from her biopsy back, mom seems to have a sense about it already. I really believe in honouring a persons feelings, listening to what their body is telling them, because no one will ever know our body better then ourself. And so despite wanting to scream no no no it just can't be cancer, the first trickles of acceptance of what my mom is dealing with is coming through.
 |
| james, Liz, Sarah, Leigh-Ann & Earla |
And then the big cry happened. It wasn't in mom's presence but during a counselling session I went to with my dear, kindred souled friend Elizabeth who has come to visit for a few days. Man did I let it rip hahaha One of those cries where I wondered should I stop so I can breathe but am unable to so you take gulps of air between sobs. Most of our family believes crying is a good thing and as mom says "have a good cry, and then you're good for awhile, well ok, you might have little cries between the big ones, but you'll feel better". Wise words mom. I do feel lighter in heart.
Oh man though, I didn't want to cry. I haven't wanted to feel what I'm feeling. It's messy and confusing...frig, it changes almost hourly! But I think the big cry dropped my emotional wall down, or at least chipped away at it, haha, and I feel less tight inside. I will keep working on feeling my feelings because I don't want to be a tough martyr who puts on the strong face.
So where does hope fit in!? I still have this deep belief that my mom will survive and thrive from this terrible disease. Does accepting it's cancer lesson my hope? My counsellor doesn't think so. We talked about the miraculous healing power of hope, love and postivie thinking. She too gave me wise words "Sarah, keep having hope. Have hope until your Mom tells you not to". Again with the honouring :)
Sent from my iPad
Sunday, November 3, 2013
19) Expect the Unexpected - Sunday 3rd November
I am learning to expect the unexpected.
I did not expect Leigh-Ann to be seriously ill. I did not expect to be in Canada. I did not expect to get so used to hospitals. I did not expect to receive so much kindness and generosity from friends in Nerja and friends and family here.
There is a lot I did not expect.
I also did not expect Leigh-Ann to have such a good day today!
It has been like night and day, black and white. She slept well after her nocturnal visit to the hospital last evening. (that was a good call). She got dressed and spent the morning and early afternoon chatting to her mum.
This evening we went out together for the first time in a few days to see The Counsellor.
Whilst I mention the film I can highly recommend it. Wow, it was just riveting, a little pornographic in places (not that that is ad) but gripping.
Afterwards we went to A&W burger bar. I had a burger and onion rings and Leigh-Ann ate half a plain burger! Not bad.
We also spoke about things which couples should probably never have to discuss: a "Bucket List" or as I prefer to say: "A List for Life".
We are still waiting for the results of all the tests but Leigh-Ann knows how serious her illness could be and what the outcome could be.
A conversation like that is also something I was not expecting to have. Not for many, many years anyway.
She has asked me not to disclose what her list consists of apart from the following: visit Cuba, swim with dolphins and go on a sailing boat. In total there are ten things she would like to do. None of them are too difficult to arrange or too extravagant.
One day she might let me tell you what they are.
What can I expect tomorrow? Who knows???
I did not expect Leigh-Ann to be seriously ill. I did not expect to be in Canada. I did not expect to get so used to hospitals. I did not expect to receive so much kindness and generosity from friends in Nerja and friends and family here.
 |
| Galaxy Cinema, Chilliwack |
I also did not expect Leigh-Ann to have such a good day today!
It has been like night and day, black and white. She slept well after her nocturnal visit to the hospital last evening. (that was a good call). She got dressed and spent the morning and early afternoon chatting to her mum.
This evening we went out together for the first time in a few days to see The Counsellor.
 |
| Leigh-Ann feeling the cold. |
Afterwards we went to A&W burger bar. I had a burger and onion rings and Leigh-Ann ate half a plain burger! Not bad.
We also spoke about things which couples should probably never have to discuss: a "Bucket List" or as I prefer to say: "A List for Life".
We are still waiting for the results of all the tests but Leigh-Ann knows how serious her illness could be and what the outcome could be.
A conversation like that is also something I was not expecting to have. Not for many, many years anyway.
She has asked me not to disclose what her list consists of apart from the following: visit Cuba, swim with dolphins and go on a sailing boat. In total there are ten things she would like to do. None of them are too difficult to arrange or too extravagant.
One day she might let me tell you what they are.
What can I expect tomorrow? Who knows???
Saturday, November 2, 2013
18) Unwelcome trip to hospital - 2nd November
It's my mum's birthday today! I couldn't get to speak to her though. She is probably out having fun. Why not she is 83!!
Today started off well. Leigh-Ann felt pretty good and thought she would like to go and see a film in the afternoon, Last Vegas, with Robert De Niro and Michael Douglas etc.
Sadly she felt progressively worse as the morning wore on and this evening we decided to go to Emergency at Chilliwack hospital.
She had felt nauseous for about 24 hours and could not eat. As a result she could not take her pain medication. Morphine was needed...
So there we were. We arrived at 6:30 pm and Leigh-Ann was pumped full of saline, an anti nausea drip and a little morphine. That's quite a cocktail. She liked the doctor, Jeremy.
Earla and I cheekily went off whilst Leigh-Ann was being looked after and had a great Indian meal round the corner. They had fantastic samosas.
Unfortunately, hospital and doctor trips are becoming the norm. I just hope that they will not become more frequent although I am not too optimistic.
Anyway, it has not been such a great day and I am tired so am off to bed and looking forward to going to the cinema tomorrow, maybe. Oh, and the sun is supposed to shine again.
Good night.
Today started off well. Leigh-Ann felt pretty good and thought she would like to go and see a film in the afternoon, Last Vegas, with Robert De Niro and Michael Douglas etc.
Sadly she felt progressively worse as the morning wore on and this evening we decided to go to Emergency at Chilliwack hospital.
She had felt nauseous for about 24 hours and could not eat. As a result she could not take her pain medication. Morphine was needed...
So there we were. We arrived at 6:30 pm and Leigh-Ann was pumped full of saline, an anti nausea drip and a little morphine. That's quite a cocktail. She liked the doctor, Jeremy.
Earla and I cheekily went off whilst Leigh-Ann was being looked after and had a great Indian meal round the corner. They had fantastic samosas.
Unfortunately, hospital and doctor trips are becoming the norm. I just hope that they will not become more frequent although I am not too optimistic.
Anyway, it has not been such a great day and I am tired so am off to bed and looking forward to going to the cinema tomorrow, maybe. Oh, and the sun is supposed to shine again.
Good night.
Friday, November 1, 2013
17) It's Friday so it's the Doctor! 1st November
So, here's the scoop!
That's exactly what Leigh-Ann would say. Canadians have lots of their own unique expressions. I'll let you have some more from time to time.
I make them laugh (not on purpose) with some of our very English expressions and pronunciations. I am sure that you can guess what some of them are.
We had a 9:00am appointment with the Nurse Practitioner in Agassiz ten minutes away. When we turned up we realised the appointment was actually next Friday but Marie (the nurse practitioner) sneaked us in the back door so the receptionists would not catch us!
We were hoping to get some results this morning but we got none. Marie swung into action phoning and chasing the results for us. An hour later she had done everything she could and we are hopeful of some news early next week.
Marie is a superstar and fights your corner!
Once we have them Leigh-Ann will have a meeting with the surgeon who will decide whether to operate or not. Next we will meet the oncologist to find out what aftercare treatment they can offer.
Yes, it is extremely frustrating for all of us but I cannot imagine what it is like for
Leigh-Ann. Try and imagine having a life threatening illness and waiting three weeks and more to find out what the prognosis is.
After ruining Marie's morning timetable with patients queuing out of the door we had an impromptu meeting with a dietician. At the moment this is one of my biggest worries. She is not eating (hardly anything)! We got some good advice and went straight to the supermarket to stock up with some foods that she can easily digest and provide as many calories as possible. I bought some chocolate for myself (why not?).
We have just seen all the video clips from all her friends in Nerja. Earla spliced them all together into a three minute tear jerker and the tears flowed a lot. What an incredibly nice thing to do. Leigh-Ann wants to thank everyone for their kind and meaningful words. We've watched it many times and every time tears flowed from all of us. Leigh-Ann thanks you from the bottom of her heart for organising it all (whilst on crutches). Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone. Yes, I cried too... Leigh-Ann can't wait to share it with her Canadian friends and the rest of her family.
The word "whilst" does not exist in the Canadian vocabulary. Go figure.
That's exactly what Leigh-Ann would say. Canadians have lots of their own unique expressions. I'll let you have some more from time to time.
I make them laugh (not on purpose) with some of our very English expressions and pronunciations. I am sure that you can guess what some of them are.
We had a 9:00am appointment with the Nurse Practitioner in Agassiz ten minutes away. When we turned up we realised the appointment was actually next Friday but Marie (the nurse practitioner) sneaked us in the back door so the receptionists would not catch us!
 |
| Leigh-Ann playing with Fraser today. |
We were hoping to get some results this morning but we got none. Marie swung into action phoning and chasing the results for us. An hour later she had done everything she could and we are hopeful of some news early next week.
Marie is a superstar and fights your corner!
Once we have them Leigh-Ann will have a meeting with the surgeon who will decide whether to operate or not. Next we will meet the oncologist to find out what aftercare treatment they can offer.
Yes, it is extremely frustrating for all of us but I cannot imagine what it is like for
Leigh-Ann. Try and imagine having a life threatening illness and waiting three weeks and more to find out what the prognosis is.
 |
| Earla celebrated 20 years in the Library service. Leigh-Ann was her very first customer when they were little girls! |
After ruining Marie's morning timetable with patients queuing out of the door we had an impromptu meeting with a dietician. At the moment this is one of my biggest worries. She is not eating (hardly anything)! We got some good advice and went straight to the supermarket to stock up with some foods that she can easily digest and provide as many calories as possible. I bought some chocolate for myself (why not?).
We have just seen all the video clips from all her friends in Nerja. Earla spliced them all together into a three minute tear jerker and the tears flowed a lot. What an incredibly nice thing to do. Leigh-Ann wants to thank everyone for their kind and meaningful words. We've watched it many times and every time tears flowed from all of us. Leigh-Ann thanks you from the bottom of her heart for organising it all (whilst on crutches). Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone. Yes, I cried too... Leigh-Ann can't wait to share it with her Canadian friends and the rest of her family.
The word "whilst" does not exist in the Canadian vocabulary. Go figure.
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